Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Periods at a time

I thought I was forgot.
Thrown aside, left undone
but the world I had so gently cast away 
loved me back
I was simply blind.

I thought I was forgot,
but I was not. 
I was merely hiding in the back
unseen, unloved, 
not left but gone. 

I thought I was forgot,
through dark halls and white tile
but I was changing dresses
periods at a time.

I thought I was forgot,
but well worn gray carpet 
was under my feet as it 
was under theirs in the blue hues of the room.

I thought I was forgot
but the brick walls were there 
one was hollow… 
leading to a far away land.

I thought I was forgot
washed out under cold burning lights and piles of cloth.

I thought I was forgot
but I was locked
in a Box

I don’t think I’m out of yet. 

1 comment:

  1. I really love this poem! I love it a LOT. Except it kind of hurts my soul, and I kind of want to hug you.

    I'm in a love-hate relationship with the line: "but the world I had so gently cast away". This might just be my personal opinion, so I would get Robby or Emily or somebody as a second opinion, but I kind of dislike the word "so" in that line. Because I absolutely ADORE the line, but the timing of it doesn't flow well with the rest of that stanza. I think maybe if you cut out the word "so", it would time better.

    I dislike the line "leading to a far away land" because it feels really off-topic to me. Don't cut the line, because I think that stanza needs to have four lines, but I think you should change it so that it's a little less off-topic.

    But other than that, I really love it :)

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